Napolean Hill, the author of Think and Grow Rich, wrote that from every negative or adverse experience comes an equivalent benefit. Another way of saying look for the good in everything.
We all know that's easier said than done, especially as parents. You find out how truly vulnerable you are in life when you have children. You want to do everything to shield them from life's rough patches, you want to soften the blow when life deals one of those unfair "why me" moments.
We recently experienced one of those very moments just this past week at our son's lacrosse game. As senior captain on the team, he was looking forward to enjoying a great season with his friends and teammates. While the team was playing its second game of the season, Alex was blindsided by a vicious check that left him unconscious and fractured his jaw. Our baby was broken. Season over.
I watched in disbelief as the play unfolded, and after what seemed like a time delay of 5 minutes but was more like 5 seconds, hopped the fence to be by his side as he lay motionless and unconscious on the field. All the thoughts well up inside of you, "Is he going to be OK, Is he paralyzed, Is his neck broken". After about two minutes with his eyes rolling back in his head, he regains consciousness and begins moving, he's still unsure of where he is or what happened but I can at least exhale. I kept telling myself he's fine, he's fine while the tears, anger, and frustration all welled up inside me. How do you explain to him that this makes any sense or is fair after he's invested so much time and energy just to play his last high school season.
After leaving the hospital with the diagnosis of the broken jaw and hearing the news that his mouth would be wired shut for 4-6 weeks, you try to move forward. Look to the future. You try to turn the page on the senselessness, violence, and that the entire play and act was unnecessary. You try to reason with yourself, your son, and your family that injuries are part of sports and that things like this happen, but deep down they don't happen to you, they don't happen to your baby.
Times like this is where we earn the big bucks as parents. When we ourselves our rattled, we must turn our fear into fortitude. When Alex was in the emergency room afterwards, his coach and teammates came to visit and were truly amazing in lifting all our spirits. The simple act of saying that you care, that you are not alone, is inspirational.
We as a family are all a little broken now, but with the help of family, friends, coaches, and teammates we will heal. The positives are a little hard to see now but I know they're out there. As we look for the silver lining, it may be simply that the injury could have been much worse, that he will heal, recover and be good as new.
With Love,
Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
Showing posts with label sports. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sports. Show all posts
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Sunday, February 26, 2012
The Love of the Game
Enjoyed //Coached a great basketball game yesterday. The boys played well but we came up short on the scoreboard. We as a society focus so much on winning on competition when really the winning and the competition has little to do with the game.
Of course, we've carried these sports qualities into Life and our daily living. We must Win, Life is a competition, You must be a Winner. This of course is a a lie. Do you win every game, do you win every championship. Michael Jordan, Tom Brady, Joe Montana, and even the greatest Ali, lost games, lost championships during their time in the game. The all time coach John Wooden was at UCLA for 15 years before he won his first national championship in 1964. Today, most coaches would be long gone before getting 15 years in one place. Losing is part of the process, part of the game, perhaps a more important teacher, and maybe patience is really a virtue
Athletes know this and accept it as part of the bargain in playing the game. If you asked any athlete whether he could play a sport but only on losing teams or not at all, all would say I want to PLAY. Why? For the love of the game. The fun, the pleasure, the JOY is in the PLAYING the game. Yes we all like to win but alas the winners are the COMPETITORS those that participate in the game. To quote, the great Teddy Roosevelt, the winners are not the critics but those that played, that ventured, that toiled, those that competed, that participated in the game.
And so it is with Life. The joy is in participating in the game, of realizing your potential, of refining and sharing your talents, of living your dream. We know what we love to do, we must do it, and in doing the joy surfaces, we are then content, fulfilled, and at peace. And when we share that joy with others, it spreads, expands, and is returned to us in greater quantity.
This is how the world and society make progress and improves. Everyone doing what they love and sharing those talents with the universe. Art, Poetry, Film, Engineering, Music, Technology, Spirituality, Writing, Social Sciences, Government, Nature, Sports, etc. We all have gifts in the various areas of life that are to be enjoyed and shared.
When life becomes a competition, a race, it becomes dull, boring, uninspiring. Life is a dance, a symphony, where we are all invited to participate, to enjoy the beautiful dance, to enjoy the lovely song. No winners, no losers, just willing participants in this wonderful thing called life.
With Love,
Coach K
Tom Kaufmann
tkaufmanncoaching.com
Of course, we've carried these sports qualities into Life and our daily living. We must Win, Life is a competition, You must be a Winner. This of course is a a lie. Do you win every game, do you win every championship. Michael Jordan, Tom Brady, Joe Montana, and even the greatest Ali, lost games, lost championships during their time in the game. The all time coach John Wooden was at UCLA for 15 years before he won his first national championship in 1964. Today, most coaches would be long gone before getting 15 years in one place. Losing is part of the process, part of the game, perhaps a more important teacher, and maybe patience is really a virtue
Athletes know this and accept it as part of the bargain in playing the game. If you asked any athlete whether he could play a sport but only on losing teams or not at all, all would say I want to PLAY. Why? For the love of the game. The fun, the pleasure, the JOY is in the PLAYING the game. Yes we all like to win but alas the winners are the COMPETITORS those that participate in the game. To quote, the great Teddy Roosevelt, the winners are not the critics but those that played, that ventured, that toiled, those that competed, that participated in the game.
And so it is with Life. The joy is in participating in the game, of realizing your potential, of refining and sharing your talents, of living your dream. We know what we love to do, we must do it, and in doing the joy surfaces, we are then content, fulfilled, and at peace. And when we share that joy with others, it spreads, expands, and is returned to us in greater quantity.
This is how the world and society make progress and improves. Everyone doing what they love and sharing those talents with the universe. Art, Poetry, Film, Engineering, Music, Technology, Spirituality, Writing, Social Sciences, Government, Nature, Sports, etc. We all have gifts in the various areas of life that are to be enjoyed and shared.
When life becomes a competition, a race, it becomes dull, boring, uninspiring. Life is a dance, a symphony, where we are all invited to participate, to enjoy the beautiful dance, to enjoy the lovely song. No winners, no losers, just willing participants in this wonderful thing called life.
With Love,
Coach K
Tom Kaufmann
tkaufmanncoaching.com
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)