Love Will Find a Way
A friend of mine finally found love after a long arduous search and they couldn't be happier. We would talk often about how there was no one out there, how there must be something wrong, why couldn't love find them. We all know how life doesn't always give us what we want when we want it but just like anything else worthwhile persistence, perseverance, and patience pays off. How's that's for alliteration!
We all know it's hard to keep facing rejection and disappointment when a relationship doesn't work but the importance of remaining open, hopeful, and even expectant will help bring about the result we want.
I'm so glad and excited to see the newfound joy in my friend's life, the right love was worth the wait. A recent update my friend is engaged and set to be married next year.
And, as the old Pablo Cruise song goes,
Yeah it's all right
Once you get past the pain
Learn to find Love again
Keep your heart open cause
Love will find a way
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8WVqjbBAdL0 (70's pablo cruise song for you young'uns)
All the best,
Coach K
Monday, July 11, 2011
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Win Baby Win!
Have you noticed the trend in youth sports today? Sports was always a wonderful vehicle to learn about teamwork, hard work, competition, sportmanship, and that old fashioned idea fun. These days it seems the focus is only about winning. What used to be great experience on the little league team, township basketball team, or local football team has morphed into a version of professional sports win at all costs mentality. From coaches to parents to fans, we've taken the fun out of youth sports.
What Happened to Fun
We have removed the simple pleasure of competing in sports. We now have 8 year olds playing a particular sport full time, with professional trainers. We have children playing 120 basketball games in a 3 month timeframe at the age of 11 years old and younger. I know parents want the best for their children but it seems we often live vicariouly through them trying to recapture our glory days. We're pushing them to win the game, be their best, obtain the scholarship. As parents and coaches, we've taken the fun out of sports. Instead of letting the children enjoy themselves, we've used the event to build up and support our own egos. We've made the sport more about us than the children.
Play Nice
At the very entry level of competitive sports, it should be about participation, competing, having fun, and learning how to both win and lose. Part of competing in sports is learning how to lose as welll as win. But more importantly is the idea of playing. We pushed the idea of competing and winning down to the lowest levels that even participating in a local recreation team becomes a burden for the children. We forget that youth sports is about skill and character development, about lettiing the children be kids and enjoy themselves.
A Time and Place
I understand the competitive nature of sports and as children mature and begin playing high school sports, they can make their own decsion of what to focus on and how much time to devote to the sport. Most top performing athletes have the innate talent and desire to get better, to learn more, it's simply in them. We should support them and guide them. Let them come to their own decisions. As they grow, sports and life become more competitive, but in the meantime, let's keep the fun and enjoyment in youth sports. Childhood should be a time of learning, nurturing, teaching, exploring, participating, and enjoying. They grow up soon enough, let them be kids.
Continued Success.
Coach K
What Happened to Fun
We have removed the simple pleasure of competing in sports. We now have 8 year olds playing a particular sport full time, with professional trainers. We have children playing 120 basketball games in a 3 month timeframe at the age of 11 years old and younger. I know parents want the best for their children but it seems we often live vicariouly through them trying to recapture our glory days. We're pushing them to win the game, be their best, obtain the scholarship. As parents and coaches, we've taken the fun out of sports. Instead of letting the children enjoy themselves, we've used the event to build up and support our own egos. We've made the sport more about us than the children.
Play Nice
At the very entry level of competitive sports, it should be about participation, competing, having fun, and learning how to both win and lose. Part of competing in sports is learning how to lose as welll as win. But more importantly is the idea of playing. We pushed the idea of competing and winning down to the lowest levels that even participating in a local recreation team becomes a burden for the children. We forget that youth sports is about skill and character development, about lettiing the children be kids and enjoy themselves.
A Time and Place
I understand the competitive nature of sports and as children mature and begin playing high school sports, they can make their own decsion of what to focus on and how much time to devote to the sport. Most top performing athletes have the innate talent and desire to get better, to learn more, it's simply in them. We should support them and guide them. Let them come to their own decisions. As they grow, sports and life become more competitive, but in the meantime, let's keep the fun and enjoyment in youth sports. Childhood should be a time of learning, nurturing, teaching, exploring, participating, and enjoying. They grow up soon enough, let them be kids.
Continued Success.
Coach K
Thursday, January 20, 2011
How Do You View The World?
BELIEFS
Do you view the world as a friendly place.
What are your beliefs? Do you believe that you deserve success, happiness, love, health, and all the wonderful things life has to offer. We often find it challenging to think we deserve or that we're entitled to all
of life's gifts, but anything you've ever achieved or received has begun with a thought, idea, or belief.
Anything you've acquired in your life began as a thought. From buying a car, phone, deciding what to eat for dinner, or what movie to watch, it started with a simple idea. The same is true for the bigger things in our lives, from choosing a spouse, school, career, or a philosophy of how to live our lives.
EXPECTATIONS
What do we expect from life. Do we expect to be happy. Do we expect good things. Do we have any expectations at all. Often we find ourselves living reactively and expecting the worst. This negative self talk is very harmful and of course leads to undesirable results. Most of the time we find ourselves talking, acting, and behaving this way without any realization on our part.
We wake-up hear the news, mostly bad then go to sleep again watching the news mostly bad and we become conditioned to this negative messaging and negative expecations. Let's make a simple shift to positive expectations, expect good things to happen, look for the good things in your life. Try and catch yourself next time you start beating yourself up when something doesn't go your way. Stop the "this always happens to me" and "i'm no good, i'm fat, ugly, stupid" chatter! Sure bad things happen we make mistakes but do we let this define us and our lives.
THE WORLD IS A FRIENDLY PLACE
We have so much to be grateful for, we woke up today, we have our health, we have freedom, we have the gift of LIFE and yet we find ourselves griping about some inconsequential thing. Pay attention to the language you use to with yourself and others especially your loved ones, catch yourself when you start playing back old disempowering memories and replace them with good energizing thoughts.
Being good to yourself starts with speaking and thinking highly of yourself and others. Try thinking of the world as a friendly place working with you to deliver all your heart's desires. Start giving yourself and others compliments. Pay attention to how often you smile and laugh throughout the day.
Just like the sunshine warms and energizes, a more postive attitude and outlook will bring more success into your life. Yes you deserve all of the good things life has to offer. Start by thinking of the world as a friendly place partnering with you to make your dreams come true.
Continued Success and All the Best,
Much Love,
Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
tkaufmanncoaching.com
Do you view the world as a friendly place.
What are your beliefs? Do you believe that you deserve success, happiness, love, health, and all the wonderful things life has to offer. We often find it challenging to think we deserve or that we're entitled to all
of life's gifts, but anything you've ever achieved or received has begun with a thought, idea, or belief.
Anything you've acquired in your life began as a thought. From buying a car, phone, deciding what to eat for dinner, or what movie to watch, it started with a simple idea. The same is true for the bigger things in our lives, from choosing a spouse, school, career, or a philosophy of how to live our lives.
EXPECTATIONS
What do we expect from life. Do we expect to be happy. Do we expect good things. Do we have any expectations at all. Often we find ourselves living reactively and expecting the worst. This negative self talk is very harmful and of course leads to undesirable results. Most of the time we find ourselves talking, acting, and behaving this way without any realization on our part.
We wake-up hear the news, mostly bad then go to sleep again watching the news mostly bad and we become conditioned to this negative messaging and negative expecations. Let's make a simple shift to positive expectations, expect good things to happen, look for the good things in your life. Try and catch yourself next time you start beating yourself up when something doesn't go your way. Stop the "this always happens to me" and "i'm no good, i'm fat, ugly, stupid" chatter! Sure bad things happen we make mistakes but do we let this define us and our lives.
THE WORLD IS A FRIENDLY PLACE
We have so much to be grateful for, we woke up today, we have our health, we have freedom, we have the gift of LIFE and yet we find ourselves griping about some inconsequential thing. Pay attention to the language you use to with yourself and others especially your loved ones, catch yourself when you start playing back old disempowering memories and replace them with good energizing thoughts.
Being good to yourself starts with speaking and thinking highly of yourself and others. Try thinking of the world as a friendly place working with you to deliver all your heart's desires. Start giving yourself and others compliments. Pay attention to how often you smile and laugh throughout the day.
Just like the sunshine warms and energizes, a more postive attitude and outlook will bring more success into your life. Yes you deserve all of the good things life has to offer. Start by thinking of the world as a friendly place partnering with you to make your dreams come true.
Continued Success and All the Best,
Much Love,
Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
tkaufmanncoaching.com
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Lost and Found - The Ted Williams Story
Did you see the lastest You Tube sensation about a homeless man Ted Williams, no not the famous baseball player, that was standing at an intersection in Ohio with a homemade sign asking for donations.
Lost and Found
Ted Williams is a professionally trained announcer with a golden voice. He falls into drugs and alchohol and becomes homeless. A local Ohio television station drives up to his intersection and offers him a dollar if he just provides a little demo of his voice talents.
Upon opening his mouth and hearing him speak, your first reaction is WOW! What a voice! What a talent. How did he wind up homeless on a corner with talent like that.
How did he become Lost.
Share Your Talents
Besides Ted's incredible voice, something else struck me about him. He genuinely seemed happy despite being homeless standing at an intersection asking for money. He is grateful, appreciative, and thankful to the man in the car offering him a dollar for the opportunity to share his talent. More importanly, someone caring enough to listen to him.
Now 4 million views later Ted is an overnight sensation with job offers pouring in from everywhere.
Let Happiness Find You
The beautiful thing about the story is that here is a person seemingly down on his luck that finds instant fame and relative fortune. A feel good story. Despite being down and out, Ted continued to go out every day with a good attitude and stand at an intersection and literally let his VOICE be heard.
We all need to let our voices be heard. Share our unique talents with the world. Let ourselves be found, and share a little love and kindness with everyone we come in contact with on a daily basis.
You deserve happiness. Let if find you.
http://www.dispatch.com/live/content/multimedia/video/video.html?videoUrl=http://www.dispatch.com/live/export-content/sites/dispatch/videos/2011/01/03/golden-homeless-voice-092457.xml
Continued Success and All the Best,
Much Love,
Coach K
Tom Kaufmann
tkaufmanncoaching.com
Lost and Found
Ted Williams is a professionally trained announcer with a golden voice. He falls into drugs and alchohol and becomes homeless. A local Ohio television station drives up to his intersection and offers him a dollar if he just provides a little demo of his voice talents.
Upon opening his mouth and hearing him speak, your first reaction is WOW! What a voice! What a talent. How did he wind up homeless on a corner with talent like that.
How did he become Lost.
Share Your Talents
Besides Ted's incredible voice, something else struck me about him. He genuinely seemed happy despite being homeless standing at an intersection asking for money. He is grateful, appreciative, and thankful to the man in the car offering him a dollar for the opportunity to share his talent. More importanly, someone caring enough to listen to him.
Now 4 million views later Ted is an overnight sensation with job offers pouring in from everywhere.
Let Happiness Find You
The beautiful thing about the story is that here is a person seemingly down on his luck that finds instant fame and relative fortune. A feel good story. Despite being down and out, Ted continued to go out every day with a good attitude and stand at an intersection and literally let his VOICE be heard.
We all need to let our voices be heard. Share our unique talents with the world. Let ourselves be found, and share a little love and kindness with everyone we come in contact with on a daily basis.
You deserve happiness. Let if find you.
http://www.dispatch.com/live/content/multimedia/video/video.html?videoUrl=http://www.dispatch.com/live/export-content/sites/dispatch/videos/2011/01/03/golden-homeless-voice-092457.xml
Continued Success and All the Best,
Much Love,
Coach K
Tom Kaufmann
tkaufmanncoaching.com
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
A New Year - Let's Make it Happy
When the new year rolls around it's always helpful to express a little gratitude for all the wonderful things in our lives. Here are a few ideas to help make 2011 and beyond a HAPPY new year
1. Do what you love no matter what. Detach from the outcome and do what you love. My friend Anthony is a contractor but his real passion is art. He is a terrific painter and despite having a busy schedule makes time to follow his passion which is to paint. Make sure you find time in your life to do what you have a passion for and something that you enjoy. What's the point of having money and material goodies if what your doing is making you and everyone around you miserable. Make the time to do what you love, your whole sense of well being will improve.
2. Practice a little more love and kindness with everyone you meet especially your family that knows all too well how to push your buttons. We often find it easier to be nice to strangers than our loved ones since we are all good at carrying around past hurts and grudges. Lighten up and let it all go. Forgiveness is a wonderful elixir. And don't be so hard on YOURSELF.
3. Give up the need to always be right. When we give up the notion of always being right and always having to win the argument we bring more peace into our lives. Susbstitute the attitude of always being right with the idea of always being kind. Our Egos our always telling us how important it is to be right as if being right means we are better than the other person. When we surrender the idea of always being right, we become more at ease with ourselves and the world around us.
4. Listen more. Talk less. We all want to be heard but most of us love to talk. Most of listen halfheartedly, just waiting for our turn to talk to express our opinion. Try being an understanding listener, just hear the person out let them express themselves. Just listen don't judge. When we listen to someone we're really acknowledging and validating them.
5. Stop judging everyone and everything. Yes, this is a hard one, it seems we've been conditioned to judge everything through our own narrow viewpoint or to be critical. How often to we form a complete opinion of someone when we really don't even know them. When we give up the need to judge others, we in turn stop judging ourselves which allows us to live more peacefully and without the need to put ourselves and others down.
6. Turn down the DRAMA. Avoid conflict and keep things in perspective. While it sometimes seems hard to avoid, living a more peaceful and happy life means eliminating the unnecessary conflict and drama that often finds us on a daily basis. When we give up our need to be right and win every argument and disagreement, the conflict and drama in our lives diminishes and our happiness flourishes. How do we reduce conflict? We simply choose not to respond with anger, hatred, or meanness. Remember, it takes two to argue and fight. We don't have to agree but that doesn't mean we have to fight either.
7. Surrender. Giving up the need to be right and to win is liberating. When we live from our passion and creativity we express and share our talents without the need for validation or approval. We do it because we love it, because it brings us joy. Do the thing and it will give you power.
Here's to a wonderful 2011.
Continued success and all the best,
With Love,
Coach K
1. Do what you love no matter what. Detach from the outcome and do what you love. My friend Anthony is a contractor but his real passion is art. He is a terrific painter and despite having a busy schedule makes time to follow his passion which is to paint. Make sure you find time in your life to do what you have a passion for and something that you enjoy. What's the point of having money and material goodies if what your doing is making you and everyone around you miserable. Make the time to do what you love, your whole sense of well being will improve.
2. Practice a little more love and kindness with everyone you meet especially your family that knows all too well how to push your buttons. We often find it easier to be nice to strangers than our loved ones since we are all good at carrying around past hurts and grudges. Lighten up and let it all go. Forgiveness is a wonderful elixir. And don't be so hard on YOURSELF.
3. Give up the need to always be right. When we give up the notion of always being right and always having to win the argument we bring more peace into our lives. Susbstitute the attitude of always being right with the idea of always being kind. Our Egos our always telling us how important it is to be right as if being right means we are better than the other person. When we surrender the idea of always being right, we become more at ease with ourselves and the world around us.
4. Listen more. Talk less. We all want to be heard but most of us love to talk. Most of listen halfheartedly, just waiting for our turn to talk to express our opinion. Try being an understanding listener, just hear the person out let them express themselves. Just listen don't judge. When we listen to someone we're really acknowledging and validating them.
5. Stop judging everyone and everything. Yes, this is a hard one, it seems we've been conditioned to judge everything through our own narrow viewpoint or to be critical. How often to we form a complete opinion of someone when we really don't even know them. When we give up the need to judge others, we in turn stop judging ourselves which allows us to live more peacefully and without the need to put ourselves and others down.
6. Turn down the DRAMA. Avoid conflict and keep things in perspective. While it sometimes seems hard to avoid, living a more peaceful and happy life means eliminating the unnecessary conflict and drama that often finds us on a daily basis. When we give up our need to be right and win every argument and disagreement, the conflict and drama in our lives diminishes and our happiness flourishes. How do we reduce conflict? We simply choose not to respond with anger, hatred, or meanness. Remember, it takes two to argue and fight. We don't have to agree but that doesn't mean we have to fight either.
7. Surrender. Giving up the need to be right and to win is liberating. When we live from our passion and creativity we express and share our talents without the need for validation or approval. We do it because we love it, because it brings us joy. Do the thing and it will give you power.
Here's to a wonderful 2011.
Continued success and all the best,
With Love,
Coach K
Friday, December 24, 2010
A Wagging Tail - Puppy Power
A few family members and friends are getting puppies as gifts this year. I know the little balls of energy are a lot of work especially for Mom and Dad. Don't believe that the kids will take care of the dog! You will be the one feeding, caring, and walking the dog. In the beginning, you are adding an extra child to the family, but the effort is so worth it. We all know of pets transforming lives bringing love and joy to a lonely, listless person or home.
WAGGING OF THE TAIL
What is about pets that attract us. Why do we feel the need to add an extra mouth to feed, care for something else, and add another item to our already long list of things to do. Our daughter has been asking for a dog for 10 years but we kept putting it off. Too much work, not enough time, all that good stuff. Children instinctively are attracted to the love and energy of a pet, they intuitively feel the connection and form an instant bond. What attracts all of us to our pets especially the children is the unconditional love, joy, enthusiasm, and energy that they provide.
When your dog greets you it's tail is ALWAYS wagging! How wonderful is that simple gesture of a wagging tail always greeting us with it's great to see you and I love you no matter what!
JOY
There's a reason we naturally gravitate to the wagging tail, it's called JOY! Our preference is to be around people and things that are uplifting, happy, joyful, and loving. All the more so when those wonderful emotions come without judgement and prejudice. Wouldn't it be nice if humans had a tail and then we could see if the person is happy, sad, or fearful. Well, the good thing is that we do come with our own tails and for us it's the face, more specifically our eyes, our smiles. But how often do our tails wag?
Yes, we have a lot going on in our lives. Adults, children, and families are busier than ever before but maybe we can start treating each other especially our loved ones with a little more kindness and a little more love. Let's leave our past hurts behind, drop the judgement, try to forgive and forget. Live fully in the present moment. Try to smile more, laugh more, drop the frown, lose the negativity, and restore the twinkle in your eyes. Watch how your energy and vitality improve.
Keep that tail wagging!
All the best and continued success.
Much Love,
Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
kaufmanncoaching@gmail.com
tkaufmanncoaching.com
WAGGING OF THE TAIL
What is about pets that attract us. Why do we feel the need to add an extra mouth to feed, care for something else, and add another item to our already long list of things to do. Our daughter has been asking for a dog for 10 years but we kept putting it off. Too much work, not enough time, all that good stuff. Children instinctively are attracted to the love and energy of a pet, they intuitively feel the connection and form an instant bond. What attracts all of us to our pets especially the children is the unconditional love, joy, enthusiasm, and energy that they provide.
When your dog greets you it's tail is ALWAYS wagging! How wonderful is that simple gesture of a wagging tail always greeting us with it's great to see you and I love you no matter what!
JOY
There's a reason we naturally gravitate to the wagging tail, it's called JOY! Our preference is to be around people and things that are uplifting, happy, joyful, and loving. All the more so when those wonderful emotions come without judgement and prejudice. Wouldn't it be nice if humans had a tail and then we could see if the person is happy, sad, or fearful. Well, the good thing is that we do come with our own tails and for us it's the face, more specifically our eyes, our smiles. But how often do our tails wag?
Yes, we have a lot going on in our lives. Adults, children, and families are busier than ever before but maybe we can start treating each other especially our loved ones with a little more kindness and a little more love. Let's leave our past hurts behind, drop the judgement, try to forgive and forget. Live fully in the present moment. Try to smile more, laugh more, drop the frown, lose the negativity, and restore the twinkle in your eyes. Watch how your energy and vitality improve.
Keep that tail wagging!
All the best and continued success.
Much Love,
Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
kaufmanncoaching@gmail.com
tkaufmanncoaching.com
Friday, December 17, 2010
CLIFF LEE IS COMIN' TO TOWN
CLIFF LEE IS COMIN TO TOWN
Wow! Philly is on fire! Cliff Lee after being spurned by the Phillies a season ago returns after snubbing the offers from Texas and the Yankees, both of which involved more $$$.
Why did Cliff Lee come back to the Phils. I know in his press conference he referenced the passion of the fans, that his wife likes the Philly location, and that the team has the potential to win a championship. But there something a little deeper, something more than meets the eye that is not being discussed or even mentioned.
CHALIE, CHALIE, CHALIE
Simply stated Cliff Lee came back to Philly because of Charlie Manuel. Chalie Manuel the stumblin, bumblin, folksy manager was almost run of town by the snooty, sophisticated media of Philadelphia for not being the sharpest tool in the shed. What the media and others didn't realize is that Charlie knew more about people, interpersonal, and communication skills than the media elite. Charlie of course has expectations of greatness, but he more importantly leads his team as a family with no preferential treatment for the superstars. He is loyal to his players and he expects hard work, dedication, and loyalty in return. When a player is in a slump, he sticks by him and defends him even if it results in personal attacks on the manager.
LEADERSHIP STARTS AT THE TOP
Charlie leads by example. When one his top players didn't run out a ground ball, he was pulled from the lineup and benched. Charlie's thinking is if my top player can lolligag then so will the other guys. The same energy that attracted Roy Halliday to Philadelphia is the same power that brought Cliff Lee. When Roy came to town, he came with a work ethic. His reputation for hard work preceeded him and transcended the entire team. Roy of course won the Cy Young this year as the national league's best pitcher.
Charlie is a players manager, a guy that keeps things loose, sticks up for his guys, and in genuinely interested in the well being of his players. Charlie Manuel is a leader, a guy that is friendly and likeable, but above all loyal. We are all just like Cliff Lee we want to be loved, acknowledged, treated with kindness, and respect. Of course Cliff Lee wanted to play for a guy like that. Who wouldn't!
All the best and continued success.
Much Love,
Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
tkaufmanncoaching.com
Wow! Philly is on fire! Cliff Lee after being spurned by the Phillies a season ago returns after snubbing the offers from Texas and the Yankees, both of which involved more $$$.
Why did Cliff Lee come back to the Phils. I know in his press conference he referenced the passion of the fans, that his wife likes the Philly location, and that the team has the potential to win a championship. But there something a little deeper, something more than meets the eye that is not being discussed or even mentioned.
CHALIE, CHALIE, CHALIE
Simply stated Cliff Lee came back to Philly because of Charlie Manuel. Chalie Manuel the stumblin, bumblin, folksy manager was almost run of town by the snooty, sophisticated media of Philadelphia for not being the sharpest tool in the shed. What the media and others didn't realize is that Charlie knew more about people, interpersonal, and communication skills than the media elite. Charlie of course has expectations of greatness, but he more importantly leads his team as a family with no preferential treatment for the superstars. He is loyal to his players and he expects hard work, dedication, and loyalty in return. When a player is in a slump, he sticks by him and defends him even if it results in personal attacks on the manager.
LEADERSHIP STARTS AT THE TOP
Charlie leads by example. When one his top players didn't run out a ground ball, he was pulled from the lineup and benched. Charlie's thinking is if my top player can lolligag then so will the other guys. The same energy that attracted Roy Halliday to Philadelphia is the same power that brought Cliff Lee. When Roy came to town, he came with a work ethic. His reputation for hard work preceeded him and transcended the entire team. Roy of course won the Cy Young this year as the national league's best pitcher.
Charlie is a players manager, a guy that keeps things loose, sticks up for his guys, and in genuinely interested in the well being of his players. Charlie Manuel is a leader, a guy that is friendly and likeable, but above all loyal. We are all just like Cliff Lee we want to be loved, acknowledged, treated with kindness, and respect. Of course Cliff Lee wanted to play for a guy like that. Who wouldn't!
All the best and continued success.
Much Love,
Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
tkaufmanncoaching.com
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