Tuesday, October 26, 2010

The Power of Focus - Let's Make the Shift

What language are we most using most in our lives today.  What language do we most tune it to or resonate with.  Did you ever notice how often your family, friends, acquantices, and even strangers begin a converstation with by listing all their problems, or how bad things are going, or how the economy/business stinks, the phillies/eagles lost, health problems, and family problems.  How 'bout some happy news. Is life really this tough?

Why is this? Focus. Let's shift our focus. We woke up today, it is a gift. Let's be thankful and make the most of today. Let's celebrate our successes, share all the good things all that is right with our lives, talk about the things we are going to do, achieve and accomplish, and move forward. The only way things will improve is if  we see them improve. Start talking and thinking abundance, success, happiness, health, goodness and wealth. Begin to attract all the wonderful things you desire into your life.  We cannot move to a higher ground by clinging onto a lower lower level.  And we need energy to move to a higher level, energy that is attained by joy, goodness, kindness, charity, and of course love. We need to look hard to find these energies in the daily news unless of course we shift our focus.

I'm not saying unfortunate things don't happen but accept it and move on.  I received an unexpected bill from my awesome mechanic. Should I pout and complain poor me or is there a better way. What if I shift the focus off of me and think how the service is going to benefit his business and therefore ultimately me. If he is not successful and goes out of business, I no longer have a great mechanic to service our cars. Interesting way to look at it yes, but from an abundant viewpoint the money goes out with love and is ultimately returned with love. Look at sharing your assets as an investment be it money, talents, creativity, caring, thoughfulness, smile or simply a word of encouragement and kindness.  Sometimes the simplest acts are the most powerful.

Turn down the negativity. Better yet turn it off! The tv, newpapers, internet, music, movies, video games, advertisers and the media are inundating us with the latest disease, crime, disaster, and tragedy. I'm not suggesting we bury our heads in the sand, we of course acknowledge it and help in any way we can but do we have to live and breathe it every moment of our lives! Do we have to become the event and relive it over and over again in our conversations. There is a better way.

Spend that media time with nature, doing something good for yourself and others, time with family and friends enjoying and celebrating life and all its wonders. Life is very good indeed. We have this day, this moment to be thankful for, to be grateful for. Try this experiment for a week or more watch how your mood shifts, how your load lightens, how your outlook improves, and your opportunities expand.

There is a better way.  I'll leave you with two of the most powerful words in the universal vocabulary

Thank You!

All the best and continued success.

Much Love,

Tom Kaufmann
Coach K

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Let's Dance - Abundance, Magnetism, Charisma, Attraction

How does the expression go? Ask and you will receive. Be careful what you ask for. What you focus on expands. And the list goes on. The funny thing about cliches is that there's usually some truth to be found. Asking is so simple, let's just ask without thinking how.

Why do some of us attract love, money, health, success, careers, friends, and happiness. While others perhaps not so much or not in the quantity desired. The simple truth is that we get what we ask for, what we focus on, what we think about, and most important what WE ARE. Take an inventory of the list of words that you would use to describe yourself or ask you family and friends to provide an honest list.

Are you loving, caring, friendly, happy, considerate, joyful, giving, kind, honest, thankful, humble, peaceful and the list of wonderful words goes on. Or perhaps your fearful, angry, frustrated, forceful, arrogant, selfish, jealous, distraught, grumpy, mean, anxious, and depressed. We have all felt these range of emotions at one time or another, it's the human experience. We have all experienced setbacks, loss of loved ones, sickness, dysfunctional families, poverty, financial setbacks, career challenges, abuse, you name it. The key is where do you spend the majority of your time, do you relate to the positive words or the negative words. The reasons as to why we are one way or the other are not as important, as the self awareness or realization that we may be living these lower energy words/life.

With self awareness, comes the ability to change to shift. Just like when we try to change any other habit, smoking, gambling, drinking, food, drugs, etc. I know that I must change to live the life I desire. Change is simply letting go. Letting go of past hurts, sorrows, pains, conflicts. Asking for and giving forgiveness. The important thing is to let all the frustration, anger, pain, conflict go. Let it go!!! If your past is holding you back, move on, leave it behind, stay in the present moment, the now, today is all that matters.

We all at times have experienced joy, love, kindness, high energy, times when we felt great, confident that we could do anything we put our mind to. Most of us muddle around in the middle ground reacting to what life gives us on any particular day. If someone cuts us off on the road, we react and our mood shifts from good/neutral to bad, or it's raining out, or we burnt breakfast, got a flat tire, stocks/401ks are down, boss ticked off, etc. We decide how we're going to live day-by-day based on what happens to us in any given moment. We live Reactive lives. Reacting to the weather, the news, our families, friends, coworkers,and society. And of course, there is a better way.

The better way is those that lead Proactive lives. Those that find contentment, success, achievement, and joy are those that attract those things into their lives. Did you ever wonder that when you feel great, great things seem to happen to you. We are magnets. Postive attracts positive, negative attracts negative. Also positive repels negative. We know this yet we walk around sulking, complaining, listless, bored, and uninspired. Why? What do we think we'll attract?

 I know we're all waiting for that spark. Well, the spark is you and you already have it. Just follow your true love, even if your obligations and responsibilities keep you from your true passion take a small step in the direction of your dreams and watch how your mood elevates and your joy expands. And if you're not ready to make that leap just yet try a gentle shift to neutral. Move away from the lower energies, shift to neutral, heal, and try that simple act of kindness first toward yourself and then toward someone else. Just try saying Thank You to someone in your life, even for the act of waking-up today. Yes, it's that easy and that powerful.

One other note. The United States is the most successful, richest, powerful, innovative, country in the history of civilization. In the course of 300 plus years, we've discovered electricity, telephones, running water, airplanes, automobiles, computers, the internet, space travel, and the list goes on. Yet with all this remarkable abundance, we are for the most part unsatisfied. Our top selling drugs are anti depressants, anti anxiety medications, we have high levels of stress, and disease. Why is this? Shouldn't we be the happiest of countries to match our tremendous wealth. The reason for our discontent is that we are not living the lives we choose. Statistics show that most of us are not happy in our current jobs and desire a change. Again, we're forced or more accurately we CHOOSE a job that makes a living and helps care for our responsibilities. This dynamic causes unhappiness, stress, conflict which of course lead to well being issues. The path to wellness, joy, passion, contentment, abundance, satisfaction, and all of the good qualities that come with living a life of inspiration are available to all of us. We simply make the choice. We know what we love to do, what we're good at doing, what makes us happy, and what ultimately best SERVES society.

We are not here for our short time on earth to dance to someone else's music. Listen for your music and get out there and dance! For our universal well being let's begin to lead lives of inspiration. That spark will ignite the world.

Continued success and all the best.

Much Love,

Tom Kaufmann
Coach K

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Just Begin

How many of us talk about pursuing our passion but never really get started. One of the many reasons for not living the life we're meant to, the life we've dreamed about is our fear of letting go, our fear of failure, our duty to responsibilities and obligations. But do we really want to go through our lives, run our race, complete our journey without doing what we really love. Without attempting to learn what our true purpose is, and the contentment that accompanies the loving pursuit of passion, we wind up wading in that middle ground. Successful perhaps but yet still yearning and unfulfilled.  That something telling us that there is something more is the voice of inspiration calling to all of us. Guiding us, nudging us to tap into our creative side and share our joy and talents with the world. 


I know what you're thinking and what you're saying to yourself. Yes But!!! The big But. I have responsibilities, I have bills, mortgage, children, college education, have to put food on the table, and the list goes on. We've all been there or are there now. A simple suggestion, just begin doing what you love as a hobby, nurture it, heed it, watch how it grows. Paint, write, sing, build, teach, play, volunteer, share, whatever the passion! Get out there and share it with the universe! First, you'll be happier and more content because you're doing what you love. Second, pay attention to the "coincidences" that begin to happen. Friends and strangers start asking about your services and products.  Let it grow, stay out of your own way with the doubt/fear, you can live your life of joy if you just allow it to happen. 


As the Chinese proverb goes, the journey of a 1000 miles begins with one step. Let's not focus on the end, let us just take one simple step in the direction of our dreams and begin to lead a life of passion. 


All the Best.


Coach K

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Family - Children

Familes are the center of our lives for most of us. And while families typically provide the love and support required for inspiration and fulfillment. The family can also be the cause of tremendous dysfunction and turmoil. In the U.S. and throughout the world, we witness this everyday.  A successful person crediting their family for their success. Meanwhile, a lost soul of a child or adult going to prison battling drugs, violence, etc. Why the discrepancy? It's more than socioeconomic? Famous movie stars, celebrities, and every day folk experiencing challenges. We see both contented and dysfunctional families across the economic spectrum. Rich and poor families alike have parents, children and family members with problems and challenges, and also successes and triumphs.  The important distinction between the families is environment but not of the material kind. 


Any family that has a person that is committed to the well being of the children, that is providing a loving, nurturing environment, will find that child/children blossoming and on the road to fulfillment and achievement.  We often see children coming to the fore and assuming the parenting role and providing the loving, nurturing environment in the event the parents are not willing/capable.  The important things we give our children are not nice homes, fine educations, proper manners/breeding, cars, cell phones, xboxes, macbooks, and the like but simply a knowing that they are loved.  The greatest feeling in the world not only for a child and for any of us is to know that we are loved.  Let your child find their path, support them, love them. If we are to be content, we must all discover our purpose, our passion.  When we force them into our idea of success, our "plan" for them, then we begin to interfere and again conflict arises.  

 
Let them make mistakes like we did, and hopefully they will learn, again like we did.  Let them discover the joy of living their dream.  If they know they are loved, they have no other choice but to return the love that is given.  A child that loves is a child that is content, filled with purpose, which leads to an improved society and better world.  
 A challenge in two parent households is when one spouse is loving and supportive and the other is the practical disciplinarian. It is important for both parents to be on the same loving wavelength, and avoid the good cop bad cop.  If the discipline involves yelling and screaming at the child, conflict, you know you're off base. I know this is not easy but regardless of what the child does the parents answer is always unconditional love.  The only road to healing and forgiveness is love.  I love you know matter what.  For all you single parents out there. A special shout out to the single moms. You often feel the need to sacrifice yourself for the sake of the children and while that's admirable, it's also off base. You must care and nurture yourself. You will need strength and fortitude for the journey, and when you see your lovebirds blossom there is no greater gift to receive. 

Let them be children. To be free, have fun, laugh, and be without too much responsibility. They have their entire adult life to be "responsible".  In today's fast paced world, the children are growing up way too fast, with schedules that would make our grandparents, even us, cringe and all at such a young age. Remember easy does it, all in good time, balance. Let them be children. Love them support them, speak well of them, and above all NURTURE them.  Be mindful of what we speak, our words are very powerful. Stay positive with the child, always encouraging, speak highly of them to friends, family, everyone.  Even when they stumble! There is always good to find. Let them know you are always there, no matter what! 


We are all connected, like the forest, as it begins with the sapling, it to begins with child. As we know, we are not only responsible to ourselves and our families but to each other.  We have some wonderful teachers when it comes to loving children such as, Mother Theresa.  And we also have the billions of everyday parents, past and present, that have simply loved and cared for their child. We will elevate as a world society when all the children are loved. We all have an obligation, as the saying goes, to reach out and help that child. Namaste.


Much Love,


Tom Kaufmann
Coach K