Non Interference
As a parent, how do you know when it's time to parent and time to let go. Time to not interfere. Very, very, hard. I'm not sure of the answer, but in having three teenagers you have to trust that you've raised them correctly, given them good fundamental principles. We have always tried to teach them to be loving and kind, even though we are not always loving and kind ourselves, especially to each other. We all know that living under the same roof can be a challenge at times!
Well just like us they have to learn some lessons on their own, you want to protect them from themselves, from their missteps, from their mistakes but some times we go too far in sheltering them from life. We know that life and experience is the greatest teacher, and that often times it takes us several "experiences" before we get the lesson. Sometimes we may never get it right. But try we must.
Our college son is home on Thanksgiving break, and he shared a story where I winced when he began. He said at school there was a fellow student he didn't know in the game room and asked if he would play Battleship with him. Our son like most kids is a video gamer, not a board gamer. He's seen the game on tv, not sure he's ever even played it before. After the game, while my son was waiting for a friend, the student asked if he would walk back to the dorm and play video games. He met a new friend and was kind and gentle to a fellow student that was "different" from him. Maybe he heard some of lessons over the years.
All I coud do was smile.
Practicing non interference in the lives of others can be a challenge in these days of interconnectedness, where instant communication is the norm. And knowing when to help and when to mind your own business can be a delicate balancing act, but listen to your heart and you'll know that you're on the right path.
With Love,
Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
CoachKaufmann.com
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