How May I Serve

We are all so busy these days running from one activity to another. I'm amazed when you see so many giving of themselves, their money or time so generously.

When we give freely of ourselves, we perform the simple act of giving or serving.  This idea of service get us outside  ourselves and opens up the flow of energy to come back into our lives. We tap into the universal principle of giving and receiving.

When we lift up others we in essence lift ourselves at the same time.  Keep on lifting me higher.

With Love,

Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
tkaufmanncoaching.com

Pragmatism Being Pratical - The Great William James

William James was a great american and is known at the father of american psychology.  Pragmatism is a fancy word for being practical.  Taking excellent ideas and putting them into practice. Here are some of his great ideas and thoughts:

• Lives based on having are less free than lives based either on doing or being.
• Acceptance of what has happened is the first step to overcoming the consequences of any misfortune.
• If you believe that feeling bad or worrying long enough will change a past or future event, then you are residing on another planet with a different reality system.
• Great emergencies and crises show us how much greater our vital resources are than we had supposed.
• Compared with what we ought to be, we are half awake.
• Action may not bring happiness but there is no happiness without action.
• Believe that life is worth living and your belief will help create the fact.
• Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.
• Begin to be now what you will be hereafter

With Love,

Tom Kaufmann

Coach K

tkaufmanncoaching.com

Expectations - Your Best

What do you expect of yourself? What do you expect of others? I have set high expectations of myself and others but really they are just similar expectations that we all have.  To be loving, to be kind, to be peaceful, content, and sharing. Yes, some days and moments are easier than others, but when we try living from this higher part of ourselves we begin to exude a confidence a sense of well being. This is our simple collective greatness.

When you expect the best of yourself and others, you find for the most part that is what you get.  When we let go of the result or outcome, and simply enjoy the process and the doing all that matters is that we have given our best. In our culture today it seems we put a premium of criticizing, belittling, or judging.  Perhaps we should focus on the effort and the energy expended.

Give your best and forget the rest.

Joy

Joy To Me
Are the Faces I See
Young and Old
Timid and Bold

The Light in Your Eye
Gives You Away
Leave it Alone
Come Along and Play

Share all your gifts
You have many you know
Turn down the volume
And let the good flow

You know that I love you
You came from my heart
I will always be here
Like I have from the start


With Love


Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
tkaufmanncoaching.com

If you want to accomplish something you must first expect it of yourself

If you want to accomplish something you must first expect it of yourself.  So many times in our lives, people have told us what we should expect, what we should do, what we will be, or what we will accomplish.

Many of us have been criticized, told we're not cool, and told that we were unworthy from strangers, the media, friends, and even loved ones. We must ignore the noise and close our ears.

When we think of ourselves as great, beautiful, and extraordinary, we live from that part of ourselves. We honor the beauty that is inside us all.  Instead of belittling your ideas or the ideas of others, think of the great things you have already accomplished and will accomplish in the future starting today.

There are many people out there that believe in you, that want to see you succeed, and will help you on your journey.  Seek them out, welcome them, and embrace them.

Yes you can do it. You can live the life you've imagined but you must first expect if from yourself.

And remember with God all things are possible. 

With Love,


Coach K

Today

The power of living in the moment is important for us to remember everyday.  Let go of yesterday and when you do look back remember the good things, the words and events that empower you and lift you up.

Yesterday is gone.  Let it go.  Today is here now and you have the gift of this moment.  Enjoy, embrace, and love it. You have great things in store for your life today.  Enjoy the moment.

With Love,

Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
tkaufmanncoaching.com

Strong and Soft Like Water

Abraham Lincoln once said that nothing is more powerful than gentleness.  The earth is 70% water and our bodies are made upwards of 70% water.  The universal power of water can be a great metaphor in our lives.

Just like a soft rain nourishes everything, the grass, the flowers, the crops, and the trees. A torential downpour can wash away those same trees, flowers, and crops.  The important thing is how the power is harnessed.  When water is used properly it gives life nourishment and strength.  We can harness this same power by practicing kindness, supportiveness, and gentleness.  Turn off the critics and silence the noise.  Let the peace of water wash over you.

A simple drip of water can create rivers over time.  And so it is with us.  We can create rivers of happiness and abundance by adopting the principle of water.  Be soft, easy, and gentle with yourself, friends, and loved ones. Everyone you come in contact with.  Let the spirit of water rush over you and fill your bucket.

With Love,

Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
tkaufmanncoaching.com

Unleash The Power of Your Imagination

Our imaginations can take us anywhere we want to go.  Albert Einstein said that imagination is more important than knowledge. We know that anything that we have accomplished in life started with a thought from our imaginations.

Let's start to put this powerful free tool that we all possess to good use.  Regardless, of where you are in your life start to imagine whatever it is you want to achieve.  Yes, just simply imagine being wealthy, being healthy, being fit, being in love, being in a career you enjoy. Whatever you want begin to imagine it being so. See yourself in that new home, new car, new relationship, or new career.

Visualize all the wonderful things in life coming into existence.  Everything you see in the world today has come from someone's imagination. Henry Ford and the automobile, the Wright Brothers and the airplane, Thomas Edison and the light bulb.

Begin to see yourself having everything you desire. Use your imagination to see all the things you want. We so often get bombarded with all types of information that we imagine negative outcomes and are victimized by fear.  Turn down the negativity and harness your imagination for all the wonderful joys you deserve in life.

Start with seeing yourself where you want to be and simply write it down, state it as a fact I am happy, I am content, I am wealthy, I am healthy.

Harness the incredible power of your imagination to achieve all that you desire.


With Love,

Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
tkaufmanncoaching.com

Let The Kids Play....It's Not About You

I was enjoying my son's lacrosse game this past weekend on a beautiful sunny Saturday.  As so often happens when our kids our playing their games today, a questionable play occurred on the field and the parents from both teams joined in and started yelling back and forth, putting the focus on themselves and not the children or the game.

We all have similar experiences that seem to be happening more frequently in youth sports.  Whether it is the idea of winning being the only thing that matters or we parents have such boring lives that we insert ourselves and assume more of our children's lives.  We had our turn, it is their turn now.

When we were growing up playing sports our parents rarely came to the games let alone cheering at the practices.  Of course, we want to support them and be there for them but when our actions overshadow our child well perhaps there is a better way.

We have a responsibility as coaches and parents to teach the players the right way to play the game. The game is not about winning, but playing with passion and enjoyment. Simply playing your best.  If that results in winning great, if that results in losing that is fine too.

Some of the plays during the game result in an injury with emotions on both sides running high.  I always try to take the perspective that the children belong to all of us, and no one should want to see a child hurt. Yet, we hear comments about how this one is "a wimp" or that they are "faking it" from the adult parents.

Is this the example we want to set?  Do we hear the words coming out of our mouths?  Perhaps, we should think how we would want people to feel and talk if our child was injured.

When we are on the sidelines we have a responsibility to cheer all the children. You can root for your team or your child, but also be mindful and respectful of the other children and team.

After all, they are all our children.

With Love,

Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
tkaufmanncoaching.com

Enthusiasm

The wonderful word Enthusiasm.  What does Enthusiasm mean? To do something with great spirit, great energy. Enthusiasm come from the greek word en theos or "in sprit or with God".  When we have enthusiasm for our work, our families, our world, and our lives, we tap into that powerful world of spirit.

We know that with that spirit or energy we can and will accomplish great things. When you feel good about what you are doing, when you enjoy what you are doing, when you love what you are doing, pay attention this in when you are in spirit when you have enthusiasm, when you have energy.

I always enjoy helping people solve a particular problem or giving them a perspective they may not thought of, this is when my energy runs high.  This is one of my joys and where I like to spend my time. We are different in that we have our unique talents that bring us and others joy. In our busy lives it is important to spend some of your time each day with this enthusiasm for life, for living.

Let you enthusiasm guide you to where you want to go, to what you should be doing.  When you are in spirit the work is not work at all but a love and a joy, it feels like play.

Play with enthusiasm!

With Love,

Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
tkaufmanncoaching.com

Coaching Youth Sports Today

Coaching like parenting carries enormous responsibilities. But what is the responsibility of the Coach?

We have this misperception that coaching youth sports today is about winning.  And as I like to say, winning has nothing to do with it!  Winning is a by product of doing things right.  Of having the players and team play with passion and play with joy.

When coaches, individuals and teams play with anger the results are negative.  Like what happened with Claude Giroux and Cole Hamels recently receiving suspensions for recent low energy events.  The player and team are harmed.

A coach has a tremendous opportunity to set the tone.  A tone of happiness, joy, energy, chemistry, and unity.  We are one. We lose as one and we win as one. Together.  There are no favorites. Yes, all players have different skills but the team is one. Team chemistry is one of the most misunderstood and overlooked component to achievement.

A sense of fairness of doing the right thing is set by the coach.  When the coach uses force and becomes a dictator they have lost the team.  When a player or team is motivated by fear instead of passion or joy the team underperforms.  When a coach treats each player as if that player is his/her son or daughter then the coach is on the right track.  And how do we treat our children, with love, tenderness, supportiveness, and patience!

Every player wants to simply feel the "love" from the coach, and each player deserves that distinction.  Not just the perceived superstars.  The stars usually get enough attention, as a coach you want to also lift up the other players. You want to make sure you are spreading your sunshine on those players that may not score the goals or make the shots but do all the essential things. That's where team harmony and chemistry are created.

When you create the feeling that we are all in this together that no one is better than anyone else, you lay the groundwork for accomplishment.  Celebrate the accomplishments and achievements of every player. Yes, it can be done and must be done.

Put winning aside. Winning will take care of itself.

Build them up, raise them up, they may surprise and become greater than you or they ever dreamed.

With Love,

Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
tkaufmanncoaching.com

Human Beings or Human Doings

Our lives today seem to be so busy, so active.  We are in a constant state of movement.  We and the children wake up at 6am and are going with activities until 7pm in the evening.  I am amazed at the kids running from one event they must be exhausted.  Like many of their adult parents.

Why are we always running? Is this what life demands. When we played sports, we played the sport that was in season, football during football, baseball during baseball, and basketball in the fall.  Now the kids play all their sport year round.  Amazing we have 8 year olds and younger playing and training for soccer, basketball, lacrosse, baseball, golf, etc. as full time jobs.  No wonder everyone is exhausted by the time they are teenagers.

Is there another way.  Can we slow down. Everyone is afraid of being left behind.  Susie or Billy will be fine not be as good as the other children if he doesn't play.  Fiddlesticks!  The purpose of sports or life is not to win, win, win but to play, participate, learn, and to ENJOY.

When we as adults make sports or life about winning or a competition those things lose their luster, we remove the joy from the activities.

Make space in your life for joy.  Your career, activities, hobbies, and family life should be about experiencing the joy in everyday living.  We as adults, parents, teachers, and coaches have a fiduciary responsibility to spread and share the joy of life with our children and the youth that we interact on a daily basis.  We need to celebrate the talents and uniqueness of each individual and highlight everyone's capabilities and greatness.

Be yourself.  We are each endowed with wonderful talents and capabilities. Many of us, even the children, are unaware.  We owe it to ourselves and others to lift each other up.  You already are great.

We simply need to honor and remember that!

With Love,

Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
tkaufmanncoaching.com

Inspiring Books

Here is a partial list of books read that have helped broaden the perspective and make the road a little smoother.  Always looking for things that inspire, help make us better than we used to be. Many of these books have consistent themes of faith, hope, and belief.  We need to continually feed our minds and hearts, like we feed our bodies on a daily basis.

1. Think and Grow Rich. Napolean Hill

2. The Power of Positive Thinking.  Dr. Norman Vincent Peale

3. The Tao De Ching.  Lao Tzu

4. How to Win Friends and Influence People. Dale Carnegie

5. Tony Robbins. Unlimited Power

6. Manifesting Your Destiny. Dr. Wayne Dyer

7. Power vs Force.  Dr. Bruce Lipton

8. The Glass Castle.  Jeanette Walls

9. You Can Work Your Own Miracles.  Napolean Hill

10 Wishes Fulfilled. Dr. Wayne Dyer

11. Abundance; The Future Is Better Than You Think.  Dr. Peter Diamandis and Steve Kotler

12. Season of Life.  Jeffrey Marx

13. Inside Out Coaching, How Sports Can Transform Lives.  Joe Ehrmann

14. My Personal Best. John Wooden

With Love,

Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
tkaufmanncoaching.com

Judging And Giving Up Our Need To Be Right

How much of our time is spent judging others and ourselves.  What a waste of energy! When we spend our time being critical of ourselves and others, we sap our valuable time and energy that can be used for more productive means.

All we have is a result.  Who is to say whether it is good or bad? And from what perspective.  A C grade on a test may be terrific for the student that struggles with the subject and has invested time and energy in achieving the result. Meanwhile, an A may be a disappointment for another that cheated to obtain the result.

Giving up the need to judge or the need to be right is a very hard thing to do, especially since we have been doing it all our lives. And since we have been judged by our parents, teachers, coworkers, friends, and peers this seems like normal behavior. But when we let the urge to judge go, we become lighter, less defensive, less critical. In many ways, we have been born with an internal scoreboard and have this internal need to keep score. Nonsense. Instead of judging and having our way, perhaps we should try understanding, more compassion.

When we let go of having to win, we free up the space to simply be.

Think of it from your energy levels.  When we are judgmental and critical we lower both our energy level and the person we are criticizing. Why, when we can replace it with the higher level of understanding and compassion, and when we find those hard to apply at times we can simply just remain silent.

Giving up these limiting lower energies frees us up to move to higher energy states, creates space for us to live to our utmost potential.

Let it go and watch it grow.

With Love,

Tom Kaufmann
Coach K
tkaufmanncoaching.com

The Miracles of Every Day

We know miracles happen every day.  Whether it is a great last second shot, a chance meeting with someone, or the simple gift of life.  When we simply acknowledge these everyday gifts, we expand our vision of the possible, and allow more goodness to flow into our lives.

We had a recent experience with a stove burner of all things.  For a year, one of the gas burners stopped working. We called the repairman that fixed the other burned and he said that a new part was needed.  He later called to say the part was no longer available and that the burner could not be fixed. The range was only 9 years old, so in disbelief and refusing that the part was unavailable, I called the manufacturer Thermador and inquired whether this part was available.  Thermador informed me that the part was discontinued. I guess they want to sell you a new range!

The other day while turning on the burners the burner that had not worked miraculously started working.  I thought Wow are you kidding me! How does this burner work and why does it work?  There is no logical reason why the burner works and yet it works. I am amazed. Perhaps it was not really broken, perhaps it unstuck itself, perhaps there was a clog somewhere.  To me that is unimportant.  The important thing is to be grateful for all shows up.  

The burner is fixed and I am thankful and grateful.  When these little miracles show up in my life, I have learned not be too logical and ask how, how, how but just smile and accept the gift with gratitude. 

Another thing crossed off the to do list. 

Thank you Father!

Coach K